Bangers & Smashed

Family Weekly Newsletter

Issue 2 Vol 4

Editor’s Note: It’s the much anticipated celebration compilation issue! Where F (plus Greggy) members proudly author several sentences (or pages, RE Jr) for the world to read and revel in their brilliance. The normal editor got some serious slack last week for not doing it on Issue 1 of the new year. Many apologies for the delay – and please, enjoy!

Important Holidays (brought to you by MJ): Sunday March 20th - First day of spring.  The day you have dreaded all winter, claiming “I will take on that chore when the weather breaks”, or “I will run 5 miles every day, when spring gets here”.  It is also, sadly, the day that Punxatawney Phil is ravaged by a wolverine.  Out like a Lion they say.

Weather (guest meteorologist AK):   The WVU fans of the newsletter will be basking in the sun (some literally, some figuratively) this week due to not only spring break in Jamaica, but also due to a predicted dominance in the ncaa tournament. Conversely, Pitt fans shall experience nothing but the chilly, damp feeling of defeat.

Bonus section of the week 1:  Wine/stogie of the week (Brought to you by RE Jr)

Mazzarro 2005 Chianti Classico Reserva -  Yummm !!  So smooth you think silk is sandpaper.  Went extremely well with the Lamb Chops we had recently but trust me it goes with cereal too.  I meant to say it could go with cereal.  Cigar of the week is Punch Rothschild.  What was once a staple in my humidor as an inexpensive everyday cigar has over time disappeared from my collection, however a re-discovery or retro ambition on my part has revived this tasty little treat in my heart.  Smoke this with a beer or a great wine (try the Mazzarro) and you won't be disappointed.  For a meer couple bucks you can enjoy a cigar few know about.  Of course now the secret is out.  Smoke up Johnny!!

Bonus section of the week 2:  SPORTS (brought to you by RE Jr)

The Pirates are riding high on hopes for the season!!!!!  They all hope to get traded to a real baseball team before the trading deadline.  Please, Please Please make a trade with me before August 1st!!!!   In other news the NFL appears to be headed for a lockout.  Fortunately for the players the owners seem to have lost the keys.  Also, the players decertified.  Does this mean they are no longer certifiable?  HMMM.  Contemplating a year without football, MLB has decided to extend the playoffs into December with a 28 team format.  Unfortunately that still leaves the Pirates out of the playoffs.  This Just in......Philly Sucks !!!   To Hockey now.... Sidney Crosby began skating today and claimed to have no concussion like symptoms.  When asked by reporters how did you feel?  He said "Mum, I don't want to go to school" and rolled over and went back to sleep.  Bylsma promised to write him an excuse and give it to the principle.  Oh and Philly still Sucks !!!

Rub dirt in it and take a lap !!

Urbandictionary word of the day (brought to you by Greggy): Badvertising

When advertisements are so bad that they stick in your memory, thus, accomplishing the original goal of advertising.

"Hey have you seen the new Progressive commercial with Flo being overly

annoying?"

"Yeah. There's a great piece of badvertising if I've ever seen it!"

Song of the Week (brought to you by MM/Tom): REO Speedwagon, Can’t Stop that Feeling

Notable Accomplishments:  Cam’s Spring Break is coming to an end while AK begins her last Spring Break. Pap & brother’s were in the local newspaper. Dr. Ali put in a trach tube today and yesterday saw a live heart beating in a chest. Tom is recovering; send get well cards. Tim went to Plates & Skates, a fundraiser where the Penguins serve food to the patrons. His server was Brent Johnson and he got a helmet signed by Chris Connor, among other items and a ton of envy inducing pictures.

Hypothetical Situation of the Week (brought to you by RE Jr):   Take your first name and/or middle name and/or last name and rearrange the letters to form a word or two word phrase then explain what it means. Example:  Carinne = Rainnec, like Rain-X for your neck. 

FWN Member of the Week: Dr. Ali!  

The most recent book Dr. Ali read was “A Discovery of Witches”, which she reports is like Harry Potter for adults. If Ali were to do a job that did not require a college degree she would want to be a travel journalist (although I think journalism is a major). Swedish fish is her favorite Rita’s flavor, and if she had to have an extra finger or an extra toe she’d pick an extra finger.

Thanks! (clap clap clap clap clap)

Encore Applause (brought to you by Greg): (Don't give me the...) CLAP! CLAP! CLAP! CLAP! CLAP!

Classifieds: Carinne checked into a location on FourSquare, and when she did a coupon popped up to save 15% on her bill. Use foursquare!

Look for more next time,

C. P.

Legs! I can see them again!

Official Editor