Hot Beer, Bad Food, Lousy Service. A Celebration Issue.

Family Weekly Newsletter

Issue 45 Vol 2

Special 99^th edition spectacular (including the extra election day ’08 edition and the April Fools ’09 edition). This week is a “best of” (according to the editor) edition; a recap of the past 99 weeks that have been documented via the newsletter. Thanks for your never-ending creativity in responses to the hypothetical situation and always providing a way to end the work week. Cheers to many more!

Important Holidays: MLK Jr Day, FWN Appreciation Week

Weather:  Looking at the FWN almanac, over the past 99 weeks, the weather breakdown has been as following:

37.8% of the weeks have involved booze rain or other forms of alcohol consumption

6.12% involve Pittsburgh sports

3.06% involve indigestion and pepto bismol

1.02% involves either a hangover, a Herf, or R Jr complaining about too much booze in the forecast for Pitt so Pitt goes on prohibition and loses their booze forecast

and 49% involved other misc items

Commonly asked Questions: The song of the week comes from, usually, a song I heard this week that I enjoy. Sometimes it’s suggested. I try to mix it up to get different genres in there, or ones that relate to an event occurring in the upcoming week.

The subject titles are a mix of anything: sometimes song lyrics (Eat your salad, no dessert), trivia questions (blacker than night were the lungs of el puko), inside jokes (Look at my pants), or completely made up entirely (Mo-om, did you wash my leiderhosen?)

WNMOTW is usually chosen if it’s your birthday, but exceptions do happen for notable good deeds or the editor’s mood.

Urbandictionary word of the day: Interestingly, the UWOTD is the most contributed to category from the FWN (with the exception of the HSOTW responses). More recipients send in suggested words than any other section.

Some UWOTDs that have become commonly used phrases amongst us:

Alcoholiday (Issue 2 Vol 1) I'm taking an alcoholiday.

Nom nom nom (Issue 39 Vol 1) "Blimpie! What are you doing?" "Nom nom nom."

Drafternoon (Issue 47 Vol 1) (at the office) Bev: three… two… one… Alright it's officially 12. Let's head down to Bettis' for the rest of the Drafternoon. 

Sofa King (Issue 9 Vol 2) Cam (sits down on the couch with a Burger King Crown)

               Nate (sits down on the couch with a Burger King Crown)

              (No words are spoken, evil death stare between the two)

              Ron Jr (on the chair, no crown): There can only be one sofa king. Fight to the destruction!

              Carinne/Alex (standing in the dining room, eating forbidden cookies, observing): You guys are sofa king weird.

  

Song of the Week: The only band to have appeared twice on the SOTW is Metallica. It debuted with “The Call of Ktulu,” S&M album version, in Issue 21 Vol 1. Later, in Issue 18 Vol 2, “Whiskey in the Jar” was featured.

Notable Accomplishments: Special thanks to everyone for providing entertaining stories from their lives (albeit embarrassing… The time R Jr ran into the screen door anyone?) for the notable accomplishments. Keep up the good work.

Hypothetical Situation of the Week:  Let's try it again. What's the magic word?

Some history:

The fewest responses to the newsletter was on Issue 12 Vol 1, “If Bud Light were to do a “Real Men of Genius” commercial based on you, what would your title be?” with only two responses. This ties with "What is the magic word?" from Issue 21 Vol 1 (palindrome anyone? I don't think this is a coincidence) which also only got two responses.

The most was tied with a few, so editor’s pick is Issue 21 Vol 2 “You're the FWN Editor. What is the Song of the Week?” (one year after the lowest response on record), although UM’s “Not so hypothetical situation of the mid-week”, where he discussed his steelers wardrobe, had equal responses.

The most discussion was about Issue 26 Vol 2: “You find a wallet with $1,000 in it. Do you give it all back? Keep some of it? Keep all of it? What if it’s $100,000?”

Editor’s Favorite: "Use your initials to create the name of an alcoholic drink." Also, "door #1, #2, or #3?" And “Rock paper scissors lizard spock”.

FWN Member of the Week: Issue is too long. This segment got cut this week.

Thanks! (clap clap clap clap clap)

Classifieds: Nada.

Look for more next time,

Smarti

Sherriff Gello Popo

Official Editor