Sweet Smell of Rain and Car Exhaust

Family Weekly Newsletter Important Holidays: The week started off with Deanna's birthday, which is shared with National Ice Cream and Tapioca Pudding Day. The 20th of July marks international Moon Day, and tomorrow represents the Ugly Truck Day! Weather: In the unpredictable weather, the week started off with cloudy, high humidity, and hot weather to get a nice stream of sweat to stroll down the backs of every civilian. Later on it changed to rain with a bit cooler temperature to allow the dead grass to live again. Urban Dictionary Word of the Day: Weekend Warrior                Somebody that parties and drinks during the weekends.                Nate: Mum, can we go get school supplies on Saturday?                B: Not a chance, I'm going to be a weekend warrior at the HH. Song of the Week: Africa, Toto Notable Accomplishments: This weeks author was not privy to anything worth mentioning in this edition of the newsletter, sincere apologies to all who were looking forward to this section. Hypothetical Situation of the Week: You have the brains, money, and connections to make one new invention for the world to cherish. What is the invention and how much would you sell it for? Internationally Known Sport of the Week: Man Vs. Horse For those that do not know, this sport that takes place in the Welsh town Llanwrtyd Wells, a man must prove his speed and agility by racing a horse through a cross country race. Strange News: The largest known black hole is withing the M87 galaxy, and is 6.6 billion times the size of our sun. Fortunately that galaxy is 50 million light years away, and to put that in a bit better perspective, Neptune is 2,795,084,800 miles from the sun (on average, thanks to the elliptical revolving pattern) and it only takes 4 hours for light to go from the sun to Neptune. PFWN Member of the Week: Tom's first car he owned was a 1971 Roadrunner, his favorite book was the Alphabet Murderer, his favorite job is at the one he is currently employed at, and if he could be a movie star in any movie he would pick a James Bond movie because of all the mystery that man holds. Thanks (clap clap clap clap clap) Classifieds: Nada Look for more next week for a new and riveting edition of the newsletter.

Would you happen to have any Grey Poupon?

Family Weekly Newsletter  

The AHA!! Deluxe edition

Important holidays: Constitution Day (Australia), Silence Day (followers of Meher Baba), World Population Day (international), and Statehood Day (Montenegro)

Weather: Hot and dry. So plan for a day at the pool or just a day to sit back and sip on a cold one (for the classier fellas) to stay cool or chug a cold one (for the less classy fellas, college kids, etc.) to forget the heat.

Hippie Dictionary word of the day: Zowie! (or Wowie-zowie!)

               An exclamation of energy and/or excitement.

               "Wowie-zowie! That is a nice car"

Song of the Week: Santaria, Sublime

Notable Accomplishments: Nate had jury duty, Cam survived his 21st birthday, Allie got a job, Brandi is back at work

Hypothetical situation of the week: You have to get to work... what means of transportation do you use?

                a. AC 130

                b. Hot air balloon 

                c. Rocket Bicycle

                d. Mach 5

                e. Rickshaw

                f. Stilts

                g. Parade Float

Lesser Known Sport of the Week: Toe Wrestling (Fact: toe wrestling was applied for the Olympics in 1997. Surprisingly, it was turned down)

Movie of the Week: King of the Zombies (1941)

Strange News: On 11 July 2012, eHarmony.com released a free app named "Bad Date Rescue" to help you get away from those unwanted creepers you meet at the bar. The app fakes an incoming call to allow you to politely bail out.

FWN Member of the week: Carinne currently has ten toes, she last ate pepperoni and banana pepper pizza, she is wearing Candies shoes, if Carinne owned a pet dinosaur it would be a raptor named Alfonzo.

Thanks! (clap clap clap clap clap)

This article is a continuous learning process so if there are any complaints feel free to put it on the back of a $20 bill and send it to me. 

49 Hues of Red

FAMILY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER

Issue 17 Volume 5

Guest Editor's Note:  Many contributors joined forces to make this a successful edition of the FWN as the entire Family is on a cruise.  Thank you!

Important Holidays:  All the subscribers look forward to the return of the Family and tales of their follies.  BK turns 49 and Cam turns 21 this week!  Remember:  growing old is mandatory, growing up it optional!

Weather:  Beautiful, booming showers filled our skies while those in this great country celebrated our independence and the Bucco's blasted into 1st place.  A hailstorm gave the guest editor's garden the smackdown and my million bell petunias evidentally enjoy being beat and look positively radiant.

Urbandictionary Word of the Day:  soberazation.  The act of detoxifying yourself through time.

As the Carnival Pride docks.  BK:  Ronno!  I've come to the soberazation we need to find an AA meeting, now!  RE Jr.:  Shanizzle.

Song of the Week:  Happy Birthday Blues, B.B. King

Notable Accomplishments:  Cam, Nate, CP, BK, and RE Jr. went power snorkeling.  Alex, Tracy, and AL won at roulette.  Nate's iPod was stolen by Poseidon.  CP managed to find a Steeler's bar in the Bahamas.  Mark reports Lana is eating and well behaved.  Her new bff is Jake and she can't wait to bite Barson and the rest of the Park Family for leaving her behind.

Hupothetical Situation of the Week:  contributed by the unsubscriber, Cousin Josh.  You have been granted the right to start your own country.  What would it be called?   Who would live there?  What would it be known for?

FWN Member of the Week:  CLOSED FOR SUMMER HOLIDAY!  Thanks!  (clap clap clap clap clap)

Classifieds:  Fulfill your lifelong dream of editorship!  Contact the Official Editor.

Look for more from another honored party,

AJ